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Author:

Jeremiah Blackburn

 

Date:

June 2007

 

Last Modified:

June 2007

 

Synopsis:

Looking at how Jesus grieved in his time of need and how we can experience grief ourselves.

 

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Other Resources:

The Emotionally Healthy Church by Peter Scazzero

 

 

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Text: Mark 14:32-36

 

Experiencing Grief Like Jesus Did

 

Introduction:

Many times, we strive for spiritual growth and discipleship and neglect the physical, emotional, social, and intellectual components of who we are.  Mark 12:30 Love the Lord with all your heart (emotions), soul (spirit), mind (intellect) and strength (physical). Secondly we are to love our neighbors (social) as ourselves.

 

For one who is experiencing emotions contrary to “hope” and joy” they are sometimes seen as unspiritual, unfaithful, or worse sinful.

 

In a thought from The Cry of the Soul emotions ignoring emotions are described in this way:

            Ignoring our emotions is turning our back on reality; listening to our emotions ushers us into reality. And reality is where we meet God. We often turn a deaf ear – through emotional denial, distortion, or disengagement. We strain out anything disturbing in order to gain control of our inner world. We are frightened and ashamed of what leaks into our conscious. In neglecting our intense emotions, we are false to ourselves and lose a wonderful opportunity to know God. We forget that change comes through brutal honesty and vulnerability before God.

 

Jesus who was entirely God was also entirely human and we can learn a lot but engaging in a study of His emotions. Today we will focus on Mark 14 starting at verse 32 to see how He grieved.

 

Mark 14:32-36

 

What emotional experience was He having at this point?

-          He was distressed – overwhelmed, intense emotional state

-          He was troubled – in anxiety

-          In Luke 22:44, In agony, His sweat became like drops of blood falling to the ground – enormous stress

-          My soul is deeply grieved

-          The Message says “He plunged into a sinkhole of dreadful agony.”

 

How He included others

-          Jesus first included others in His pain – He told them what He was feeling – He didn’t hide it! The Message says “"I feel bad enough right now to die. Stay here and keep vigil with me."

-          If you are experiencing pain or grief, invite others to come along side you

-          He also gave great advice to all of us who are with someone in pain…just remain (be with) and by implication in verse 38 watching and praying is tied in together

-          Often times the only words that will be remembered in times of grief are phrases that sound spiritually mature but are really emotionally shallow.

-          My mother had a child who died just a few hours old and one of the comments made was “God must have needed another angel in heaven”…she still is angered by that comment many years later.

-          Other comments made that are not good to make

You’ll see him again               God won’t give you anything you can’t handle

            Just give it time   Be grateful for the time you had with them           I know how you feel

 

 

He also dialogued with His Father

-          The Message says "Papa, Father, you can - can't you? - get me out of this. Take this cup away from me. But please, not what I want - what do you want?"

-          Abba – so personally intimate form of Aramaic for Father that the Hebrews didn’t use this word because they thought it disrespectful

-          So many thoughts – thoughts of His mother, His disciples (3 years of traveling with them), the women and men that He had experienced (Lazarus, the woman at the well, the woman caught in adultery, the soldier under authority)

-          Thoughts of what was to come – the pain and torture, the separation from His Father, thoughts of His character, holy in nature, being marred with the sins of the world

-          All things are possible for you yet I submit myself to your will. Not what I want but what you want.

-          It was the intimate communion with His Father that allowed Him to embrace this time. This time is often referred to by some as a cup of suffering.

 

We all have our own cups to drink out of.

-          What is this cup? It is our cup of life.

-          Though the sorrow and pain were there and the joy of a relationship restored was also there.

-          Likewise we have our own cups of life to embrace filled with sorrow and joy. It cannot be separated into two separate cups.

-          It is in that place in which we acknowledge reality and allow Abba to send the Comforter.

-          My pain allows me to help experience someone else’s and also allows me to be open and transparent.  Not only acknowledging our sorrows will allow us to know God more intimately but it will also allow us to connect with each other in community. In every situation there are three stories at work…God’s the other person’s, and yours, intersecting at this point and time.

 

The strength comes from knowing God

-          Jesus came that we can have eternal life (John 3:16) Eternal life though is not just a future life after we die but is a life of knowing God and Christ (John 17:3).

-          When you know God you don’t need to know why. A Nazi concentration camp inmate breathed these words.

-          Truly knowing God allows us to be open with each other and with Him about being honest what we are going through.

 

Conclusion

-          Several months ago I took an inventory which rated me as a emotional infant in embracing grieving and loss. Since then I have been learning through a program at the hospital how to begin to do this.

-          The emotionally healthy church says “In emotionally healthy churches, people embrace grief as a way to become more like God. They understand what a critical component of discipleship grieving our losses is. Why? It is the only pathway to becoming a compassionate person like our Lord Jesus.”

-          It goes on to say Loss will transform us or destroy us but never leaves us the same…Loss can make us more, and sorrow us good for the soul. The soul is elastic and can grow larger through suffering.”

-          I invite you as I know I still have a huge lesson left to learn myself to begin reflecting upon your loss and grieving, inviting others in, and embracing the cup which God has given you.

 

 

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